Cognitive Behavioural Psychotherapist.
What Makes a Family Functional?
What is a functional family?
How do we know if we have one?
How would you define a functional family?
The study of family dynamics, family therapy, and treatment is complex and a whole field of psychology in itself.
No family is perfect, even the functioning ones.
Table of Contents
The following is a list of qualities that make up a family that functions effectively. Functional families encourage and provide:
Respect:
Respect is the binding essential ingredient of a functional family. All people in the family must be respectful as consistently as possible. Being kind-hearted to each other is the glue that will bond the family for the long haul.
An Emotionally Secure Environment.
All members of the family need to have a voice. They are freely allowed to share their opinions, thoughts, wants, dreams, desires, and feelings without fear of being criticised, shamed, belittled, or dismissed.
There are clear boundaries in the family.
We aren’t each other’s friends. A parent is a parent no matter how friendly they may be. Parents’ responsibility is to lead and to train and teach their children.
Children are kept out of tension between the mother and father.
The mum and dad do not make disparaging or negative remarks about one another, especially in front of the children.
There is open communication among all family members.
Communication does not go through one person. Children are encouraged and allowed to speak for themselves in a respectful manner.
Conflict is allowed.
A functional family will have conflict. Sometimes things might be said that is regretful. If we can feel and show remorse for our part, (that includes parents) quickly apologize, ask for and receive forgiveness, no harm is done. You may even become closer for it.
Allow appropriate Expression of Emotions.
Express anger, in a controlled manner. Teach empathy and how to respond sensitively to each other. Parents need to model this behaviour also.
Encourage family members’ development.
Individual differences are appreciated, even celebrated. This allows the kids to become independent when it’s appropriate and come back to the safety of the family when they need nurturing.
The adults in the family need to be allowed to grow as well. A mother may want to get back to college, or a father may decide to change jobs and start something new. These changes need to be discussed about how they will affect everyone in the family, adjustment, perhaps negotiation, but again, if done with respect everyone can be satisfied.
Parents Work as a Co-Parenting Team.
A functional family is one where the adults are at the center of the family, in charge, and pulling together in the same direction. This creates a very secure environment for the children. In a functional family parents, divorced or married, take responsibility. Kids need the assurance that the adults are in control, even if they may not thank you for it.
So hard to do in today’s society but research does show that communication within a family is enhanced if we take more meals together, even if it’s in front of the TV.
What defines a functional family? A functional family is characterized by qualities such as respect, an emotionally secure environment, clear boundaries, open communication, constructive conflict management, appropriate expression of emotions, encouragement of individual development, effective co-parenting, and shared meals, fostering a nurturing and supportive atmosphere.
How can we improve communication in a functional family? Improving communication in a functional family involves establishing an environment where all members feel safe to express their thoughts and feelings openly, without fear of judgment or dismissal. This can be achieved by practicing active listening, encouraging direct dialogue among all family members, and providing opportunities for family discussions.
Is it normal for functional families to experience conflict? Yes, it is normal and even expected for functional families to experience conflict. What distinguishes functional families is how conflict is managed and resolved. In a functional family, conflict is addressed constructively, with an emphasis on understanding, forgiveness, and growth, allowing family members to become closer and strengthen their relationships.
Time limited offer
✔️ Receive training in all the major schools of psychology.
✔️ You can do the courses one at a time! You can even gift one to a colleague.
✔️ A Diploma Certificate is awarded for each course successfully completed.
✔️ There is no time limit for completion – take your time and enjoy the learning.
©2023. The Behavioural Training Institute
